The final chapter ... part 2

the next night i was about to sleep

crying

mom dkhalat 3aley

she came and hugged me

mom: sadan 7bebty

i hugged her so tight

me: yuma adre eny 6e7t men 3ainch w adre eny swait shay ghala6 walla adre t7saft bs shasawey wala magdrt yuma a7b shamlan w matwq3t byoum ena ra7 ymot

mom: shkentay 7a6a ib-balich

me: glt btzwj shamlan w happy ending

mom: sadan mu kelshay t7lmen feh y9er hathy el7yah t9dmna bashya'a mantwq3 t9er w wayed 9dmteny 3umre matwq3t ench btklmen knt wathqa fech w 7sbtch gad eltheqa mag9rna 3alech bshay bs shaswe magdr aswelich shay entay menhara


i started crying


my mom kissed my forehead and told me

mom: sadan yala namay

me: okay t9b7en 3ala khair

mom: wentay men ahlah

i started talking to my self saying:

" i wish i didn't know him"

"lish ga3d y9er feny chthy?"

"a7bah walla i do"

"im dying ... i wish mat3lgt feh hal kethr"

till i fell asleep




the next day i woke-up finding leens on my bed playing with my ipad

me:leenaah? 

leens: good morning

i smiled

me: sa3a cham?

leens: 10 , yala gomay ghaslay ahalich yn6ronch 3shan ntryg

me: okay


i went to the bathroom washed my face
then nzalt t7t with leens


i didn't eat anything just drank my orange juice

dad: sadan 7bebty lazem taklen mu zain 3alich

me: yuba mu yu3ana kelish male khelg shay

dad: 3ayal mentay ray7a elzwara elyoum

me: la

faisal: sadon mnu hathy rfejtich awal mara asm3 feha

me: mat3rfha

faisal: mentay ray7a 3zaha?

me: inshallah

faisal: men benta?

me: uf shfek tsa'al wayed khala9 3ad

faisal; glna rfejtich matat bs latnfsen 3alena bs sa'altich

me: way3 waay3

i went to my room
 and
leenah followed me


ma abe a7d y7acheny jad male khlg shay


i was so close with shamlan he was everything to me
losing person i cant spend a day without
isn't easy to forget , it was so hard to me
i don't think fe shay by9dmny akthr men motat shamlan

he promised me to teach me how to drive a car..

now hes gone.

i told leens to sleep at my house hal ayam to get better


when i was in the room with leenah

someone called me

leens picked it up

leens: alo?

someone: alo wen sadan?

leens; kahy mnu agolha

someone: her cousin jara7

leens: ok

*leens whispered*

"sadon jara7"

me: mabe akalma

leens: shagola?

me: malha khlg a7d

leens: malh khlg t7ache a7d

jara7: golelha 3tham allah ajrha

leens: ajerna w ajrek

jara7: inzain s2leha menu 3rf men ahlha?

leens: omha , ekhtha w murt okhuha sara

me: laaa leena *and i smiled :) *

leens: madry sa'alny :s

jara7: ok yalla ana barou7 bye

leens: bye

leens: 7aram :(

me: huff whatever golay 7g rose abe cornflakes yu3ana

leens: hehehe okay 7ta , ana fe nas mthlaw 3al breakfast

me: chub yalla male khlgch

leens: hahaahaha ok















.....

at 8 pm

mom came

mom: sadan

me: hmm?

mom: jara7 dag 3ley

me: shgalich b3d

mom: jra7 ydre 3n shamlan
me: ee rfeja

mom: thalny thal w kh6bach 3shan yster 3alich wayhe 9ar hal kobra many 3arfa shagol elkl ana mrbetch tarbya elkkl yt7cha 3nha men ygolon sadan al**** w ne3em feha bs entay 76etay rasch blga3

me: la7tha jara7 kha6bny??

mom: ee w btakhthena

me: la musta7el yuma musta7el mabe

mom: btakhthena w qa9ben 3alich

me: etha oboy sa'alny bagola la

mom: w ana agola ee

me: w bysm3 klamy

mom: w agola bentk fshltna w agola kelshay 3anich , sadan elbnt som3a

me; eee adre bs mala da3y atzwaj wa7ed mawa6na b3eshat alah w ana mu awal wala akher w7da aklm

mom: sadan khalaa9 btakhthena w relich fog rasch 3ndch kalam thany khleh 7g nafsch a9lan ana madry shlun ga3d tnaqsheny bhal mwtho3 elmfroth t7trmen nfsch w tshkren rbch fe wa7d ydre 3an ely tswena w rathy fech

i cried

mom: mar7 ynf3onch haldmo3 ana qrart w btzwjena

me: mom please no ..

and she left the room

i was broken

"i was crying so hard that i faked a faint
3shan ome tkhaf w tetradad

they called the ambulance
and when I'm in the hospital i opened my eyes and tears fell from my eyes

me: yuma please

mom: 7mdelah 3alsalama
me: mama please
please...
please..." 











that didn't happen.

i was telling this leens bs she said mara7 ynfa3
so skat w rthet blwaqe3

things doesn't go the way we wish,
life isn't fair
sometimes life shock us with things we didn't expect 

but we should accept and move on..


days passed
w i got married to jara7

and i told him that i hate him so much
and he didnt care at all and he said youre gonna love me soon ...






and i'm pregnant now with a baby boy

i'm gonna call him "shamlan"








jara7 was sleeping


but i couldn't sleep



" its been along time i didn't see you or even talked to you
i miss you
i miss your voice
i miss your smile
i miss your stupid conversations
i miss talking to you
i miss how happy i was with you
i need you next to me
i want you back
im nothing without you

i'm lost
i'm lonely 
i cant find my way back home

i love you
i love you more than i did before

no one can take your place
its getting harder each day  

i'm thinking about you all the time
every-time i close my eyes

i remember the old days
i want you to hug me and tell me:

'everything is alright'

well i tried to live without you
but tears fall from my eyes
yes i cant

i'm alone inside
i can only hear your voice ringing through the noise

i feel empty
i never wanted to lose you

if i can do anything i will choose you to stay
you're the one that i hold on to

i cant let it go
i wish i was there with you to tell you

please stay , don't go fight to the end
i wish its just a dream

but i cant change a thing
its killing me

i'm dying but nobody can feel it
im in pain when youre away 

i'm losing my mind waiting and waiting
for you to be mine

but i promise i will never forget you"


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
this end is true without adding anything
and this is sadan's sad ending

thank you guys for supporting me
i appreciate that

i promise im gonna write another blog soon
and i hope you liked it xox

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@thereisnochance
please leave a comment xox

Final chapter ... Part 1

the day after rj3na el-bait

3ala elsa3a 8 pm


we ate dinner

and the day passed normally




the day after


i went with my family to eat lunch
at al-senobar "Lebanese restaurant  "

with my brothers 
faisal , muhamad and yusef

sara and her kids


my sister shadan and her husband
 and my parents

been along time ma6l3na with each other

we had fun 
and the best thing was

shadan: eeh yuma al7een 3aly "her husband" bro7 France one month b3den yrj3 el-kuwait 3ala 6oul ana many ray7a ma3a

mom: haw lish mentay ray7a??

shadan: yuma shfech gemtay tnsen gtlich el-doctor  galtly mu zain asafer

yousef: lish shfeech???

shadan: matdreeyy???

yousef : shfech ta7chay 3asa mashar

mom: shadaan 7ameel

yousef: 9ijj?? mabrrrok w lish ana akher wa7ed yadre

me: 7ta ana tawne adre mabrook shadan


   



we got back home






after dinner 


all of us sat together in the living room watching TV

*ring*

home's telephone was ringing 

i picked it up

me: alo

someone: wain sadan?

me: ana sadan



someone: shamlan 36ach 3oumra

me: huuuh?? muta shlun? mnu?

that person closed the phone

i closed it

but no one noticed kanaw mndmjen bl-tv

i was soo sooo shocked 

my eyes wore full of tears.

i went quickly upstairs 

i called leens

kanat 6al3a with her cousins 


me: leeno

leens: hala shfe 9outch chthy?

me: tawaa da.. dagaw 3ala telphone baitna galole shamlan mat
 
leens: NA3AM!

me: leeeen shasawe *started crying*

leens: fechay el-jaredah

me: leenah ohwa men ams mayrd 3aleh leenaa *crying*

leens: FECHAY EL-JAREEDDAAAH

me: inzain afchha w adg 3alich

leens: okay bsr3a bye


i closed the phone

went down khathet el-newspaper w r7t my room

sara ham ra7at ma3ay up bs ehya ra7at with her kids 3shan tnawemhom

i closed my room's door 

opened the newspaper 

3ala 9af7at elwafeyat

malget his name


i started laughing, laughing so hard!

i was the happiest person in the whole world

and i called leens

me: leenaaah "happy voice"

leens laughed : shnu?

me: malget esmah

leens: 7sait yswe fech prank 

me: 3shan chthy ma yrd 3ley men ams 3shan a9adeeg ambeeh lenah matdren sh9ar feny!
baghet a9arekh jedam ahaly elmushkela lish ykhly his friend madry mnu ydg 3ala telphone el-bait w jedam khwany lu es2alony

leens: whew 7ta ana met men elkhar3a yalla call him w zfe

me: hahaha okaay


i called shamlan's cellphone 


me: shamlaan way3 7araktk 7adha khaysa khalb9tny 






"entay matfhmen? shamlan mat"

me: mnuu??



" ana bader"


i laughed  


me: khala9 3aad bader 3a6ny shamlaan

bader: m6awla? agolich shamlan mat fehmay

me: fchayt 9af7at el-wafeyat malget his name  ;)

bader: fchay page 2 7adeth sayara 

closed the phone


i didn't know what to do
i'm confused 
 
i opened the second page
i knew ena mu 9ij bs khal at2akad























i saw shamlan's name!



in 7adeth sayara as what bader said

i don't know how to explain what happened to me that day

i called leens

leens: ha sh9ar ba3ad?

me: lgait esma

leens: what! men 9ijch sadan golay el9ij mu wgta tswen el-prank feny! 

me: leenah legait esm shamlan kahu 7adeth b6rej elshalehat

leens: sadan hold on bakhle my cousins yg6ony 3alich

me: leenah ... leenah.... many gadra atnafas leenah 

*tears falling from my eyes*

leens: sadon 7yaty kany yaaya n6ray

i closed the phone

and leens is on her way to me

i called shamlan's cellphone


me: alo shamlan  "crying+laughing"



bader: sadan shamlan 3a6ach 3oumra

me: kahla9 3ad bader 3a6ne shamlaan *crying*

bader: sadan ensay shamlan w delete his number and don't call again

i didn't say anything

bader: sadan i'm sorry matdren sh9ar feny lama 3rft shamlan 7sbat okhuy w etha esloby chthy le'anny mu gadr astw3b ena rfejy mat

* i cried in loud voice*

me: adre enk tchatheb 3aley

bader: sadan SHAMLAN MAT ENSY!

and here estaw3abt ena  

SHAMLAN MAAAT!!





i cried in loud voice and screamed.

sara kanat nazla ma3a fawaz le'anna maybe ynam byg3ad t7t w sma3at 9rakhy 
 w fawaz khayef w mstaghreb

fawaz: mama shfeha 3amty sadan? ga3d tabchy 7ail

sara: 7beby fawaz enzl ta7at ana bashofha

fawaz went there

sara came

sara: sadan shfech??  *shocked*

i didn't reply
just crying

sara saw  the newspaper w shafat shamlan's name on it garat w she knew everything


she hugged me

sara: 7beeebtyyy sadan latbcheen

she cried with me

sara: khala9 sadan la tbcheen

me: saraaaa .... shamlan maat 




----------with fawaz----------

fawaz: baba baba 3amty sadan  tabchy 7ail w t9arekh

ahaly kelhom khafaw
76aw the tv mute

and they heard my screaming

kelhom khtr3aw w 93adaw fog

they came to my room


mom: yuma sadan shfeech? lish tabchen sh9ayer

sara: nzlaaw maku shaay ana m3aha

dad: shfech sadan t7chay w lish sara tabchen ma3aha?

sara: 3amy rfejtha matat khala9 ana m3aha nzlaw t7at

my father and brothers nzlaw

but mom and shadan stayed.

shadan : ay rfeja? leenah?

mom and shadan shafaw the newspaper was opened  3ala el-page ely feha shamlan's car accident 

mom: maku esm bent

shadan: sadan... awh sadan 7bebty

mom hny stw3bat lama garat esm shamlan mat b7adeth

but she didn't  do anything 

leens came

that day was just like dream
i cant find the right words to explain it.

my mom sahafat his pic's w galat 7g leens to delete them and everything that reminds me bshamlan


the next night i was about to sleep

crying
mom dkhalat 3aley

she came and hugged me saying:

........

chapter 24

as i told you lulu in shamlan's schoolo

so look what happened 



"LULU"


"LULU"


"entay tets3b6en? shtaben belthab6 entay lish lazga cham mara gltely ench t7beny w ana a7grch y3ne matfhmen? laysh taben tkharben beny w ben sadaan??"

its shamlan 


lulu: shamlan wkher 3any male khlg yu3ana w baro7 el-cafeteria akel

shamlan: ana a7acheech why did you lie to her?

lulu: m6wel ? kefyy bs go away

shamlan: redaay 3aleeey

lulu: sorry shamlan mabe sadan tkhareb bena w ruin our friendship

shamlan: 7asasteny ena e7na best friends forget it w laykun 3balich byoum men alayam alteft 7g wa7da methlich

lulu: lish shfeny ana?

shamlan: zbala w sum3etch wa9la elduwawen w KHAFEEFA

lulu: way3 shamlan i hate you ent w your bitch  w m7d khafef ghayrkom

she went 

shamlaan kan 7aail 7aail m3a9eb

and he wanted to start a BIG BIGG  fight and he ran to her and screaming but his guys friends came and hold him cuz he wanted to do something crazy!!! really crazy.


he loosed control 

he went to the principle office

blah blah blah ..

after the school
and he told me what happened

i told him ena ywakher 3anha 3shan mayswe meshakl
plus he is in private school so shahar 5 tbde his finals mala da3ey meshakel 3ala akher sena and akher month



days ... days and days
 
anyway

khla9na finals shamlan khla9 gable


---- the last day in school----


after the last exam
6ala3t with my mother to eat breakfast

ba3ad ma36lt b4 or 5 days graduation party
so this 4 or 5 days kela 6al3a with my mother to buy clothes ,shoe ....etc.

my graduation party was amazing
friends , family it was really amazing

the next day r7na khiran

also shamlan

12 am 
i called shamlan cause everyone was asleep so it was boring.

he was in the car heading back to the chalet from ra7aal

shamlan: auuh sadoon 7a6en eghnyat abeek w ma abehom 3ala el-radio 

shamlan sang with the song and laughing

"sadooon a7eeebiiiccchhhh"

shamlan said that in loud voice

i laughed 
"ana akthaaaaaaar"
 

we spent a weeek in the chalet
as you know ana takhrjt so lazem aswe tasjel w qbol eljam3a 
and ramdhan ne9 el3e6la fa there's no way to travel
maybe nsafer bl3eed ..

and shamlan bro7 with his friends dubai bel eid 
w ana a7n 3ala omy nro7 dubai bl3eed 3shan enkon m3a shamlan...

the next day i told shamlan to hear a beautiful song 
called " the power of love" by celine dion

i love loovveee that song
the best part
that touch my heart 
" cause i'm your lady
 and you're my man"

"never wonder where i am
 cuase i'm always by your said"

the next night 

shamlaan called

shamlan:  sadoooooon your songgg

"ya 7abeebbyyy wedy lu t3rf ghalak wedy tshof elgal wshlun mayghlek.."

my fav part!!!!

me: awwwwwwh s
and i sang with it

suddenly my mom came

mom: sadoon lish ga3da t9arkheen? shmga3dech hal 7aza?

me: ah mayane noom

i closed the phone quickly

mom: mnu t7achen

me: mama ma7d 

mom: 7a6a telphonch 3end athonch w t9arkhen

i laughed

me: la mama 7a6ta 3ala athony ga3da asm3 eghnya w mu ga3d a9arekh ga3d aghny ma3aha

mom: ahaa latsm3en aghany w mu bhalwagt yala namay bacher bn7ader

me: ok goodnight


mom: w entay men ahlah

---------------------------------------------------
@thereisnochance
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chapter 23

The next day

i was eating breakfast with my family

me: yumaa bafta7 booth
mom: shnu booth
me: fe ma3rath shahar 4 esma get2gether babe3
mom: shtbe3en? hdom?
me: laa redbull 
mom: teft7en booth 3shan tbe3en redbull el-mawjod bljam3eyat?
me: laa abe3 redbull ma3a flavors strawberry raspberry w snack w chthy
mom: hmm.... ma3a mnu?
me: ana w leen w ghayda w reem

and my mom keep asking me 

mom: khala9 ok kalmay oboch w ekhthay mena flos 3ad ana w khalatch nzorkom  w nchyek 3alekom
me: laaa yuummaa 7abebty may9er e7na n3rf nt9araf la tkhafen 3lena

my mom laughed 
mom: okay okaay

leens called me and i told her ena my mom rethat and she said ena lulu tabe tdsh ma3ana

i cant tell her no
so i said ena its okay

and finally its April
nro7 el3a9er 
nswe our booth
and it was really fun

friday
i was in the booth alone with lulu
waiting for leens
reem and ghayda kanaw yebon elnas to our booth

shamlan , bader and their friend ahmad
came to our booth to buy from us

lulu said to shamlan
lulu: halla
shamlan skipped her and came to me
shamlan: abe 3 redbull with raspberry 
me: ok

i made the redbull and lulu helped me with that
i gave bader and ahmed and lulu gave shamlan
lulu: bl3afya
shamlan: allah y3afech
shamlan gave me the money

and suddenly

ouhh shamlaaan

its jara7
oh my god 
shamlan salam 3ala jar7 also bader and ahmed

jara7 waited till mara7 shamlan and his friends
jara7: sadan t3alay
me: magdr akhle rfejty bro7ha bel booth
jara7: gtlch t3alay la tkhleny aswe shay tndmen 3aleh
me: jara7 hatha my booth ma agdr 
jara7: walla ya sadan awrech shay mashfteh gtlch ta3aly ma3aay yaallaaaa
" in loud voice"
lulu: sadan mnu hatha??
me: my cousim
lulu: ro7ay m3ah la yfshlna i can handle it
me: huffff ok


6la3t men my booth 
and jara7 was so an angry 
w sa7abny men edy
me: jara7 shway shwaay mu jedam elnaas ftha7tnyy


he didnt say anything till we arrived to his car


jara7: ENTAAY YANETAAY WALLA ENCH MU 9A7YA " loud angry voice"
me: ana shsaweet? y3ne ohwa shara meny areda?
jara7: la walla ? men 9ijch ana mu 7mar wala 
me: ambeh wala jara7 men 9ijkk? jad way3 fashltny jedam elnas shbegolon? w fashla akhle elbanat bel booth w ys2lony agolhom weld 3my elmu3aqad khathany le'anny b3t 7g walad redbull 7mdelah welsheker
jara7: ana m3aqad? b3tay 7g mnu belthab6?


.....


jara7: ta7achay b3tay 7g mnuuu???
me: malek sheghel feny enta mu okhuy
jara7: bs entay bent 3amy w la7tha ana mu okhuch? ok ana bagol 7g faisal w nshof shnu ygol w etha swalich shay feisal shbtgolela? enta mu oboy?
me: mala da3ey tgol 7g oboy w ukhwany waay3 jara7 akrehek enta 7aqer jad akrehek krahtny b3eshty 
jara7: shftay shlun? ma3ndch rad ana baye boothkom kel youm len ykhl9 el-expo w yam boothkom ahsofa ygareb 
me: enzaain enzaain uff al7en wen btwdeny?
jara7: elbait b3d wain?
me: laa taw elnas wala my friends byz3lon etha r7t w khlet elsheghel 3alehom 
jara7: mashallah ur booth za7ma 
me: ee?
jara7: kela shabab w m9kharah
me: a6redhom mathlan?
jara7: elmshkela ena ahalich maydron 3nch


i wanted to say " mu ga3d aswe shay ghala6"
bs i am doing something wrong 
so asket a7saly

from that day
 w jara7 wagef 3end elbooth

w ay expo aro7la ymshe yame 
wen ma aro7 ashofa

huffff 
there is nothing i can do


ma9art wayed ashya after that ....

i remember in may .....

it was leens birthday 

i wanted to do a surprise for her 
she deserves that
she's my best friend closest than my sister



Thursday

in the school

me: leens t3alay betna elyoum
leens: hmm.... afakr
me: t3alay 
leens: hahahah okaaay

when leens came to my house



SURPRISE !!!















leens: aaaawwww myyyy goooodddd so cute matwq3t
i hugged her so tight 

me: i love youuuuu leenaaah sweet 18





we sang 
" happy birthday to you .... "
hahaha 
she didn't want us to sing it but we did

we ate dinner and then the cake
and all of us gave her gifts 
we took pictures 
w 76enaha b-instagram

gabel elsa3a 11 
y3ne taqreban 10 w shay
i was using my phone to chat with shamlan
suddenly i heared 

"you're slut "

i was shocked
lfet wayhe
me: whaat ???
it was lulu
lulu: yes you are
me: lulu shfeech?? ynetay
lulu: entay ely yanetay ga3d t7achen my boyfriend 
me: men muta shamlan your boyfriend 
lulu: men mutaa??? men gabel la t3rfena 
me: 7mdellah welsheker latg3den tchthben w t6l3en esha3at
lulu: tara yl3ab 3alech mama lat9dgen nafsch wela entay mnu by6el bwayhech ohwa gale bnafsa
me: agool thlfaay bara yal chthaba shayfa wayhech entaay

and we started a fight !!!

leens: laaa girls stop it

lulu yanat she was jealous so bedat t6gne

and the fight got bigger and bigger

kel elbanat ely mawjoden fachechona w 7awelaw yhdon elwath3 len 6la3at lulu and i went upstairs to my room
kent 7aail m3a9ba
leens ma3ay bel room

me: hathe maynona lazga 7mdellah welsheker mu 9a7ya
leens: 7greha m7tra
me: huff sorry leens kharbt ur birthday
leens: la its okaay 

i called shamlan and i told him what happened 
and he swore ena he never loved or even talked to her as a girlfriend
i believe him

and the days passed
the good thing that shes not in my school
the bad thing enha b-shamlan's school 

.........

.........

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
thank you guys for supporting us i appreciate that xox 

and i hope u like it x

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@thereisnochance

chapter 22

we9alna el-bait

changed my clothes
i was about to sleep

*DoorKnock*
me: come in

and its my sister 

me: aw shadan
shadan: sadon btnamen?
me: yupp
shadan: b7acheech
me: shfech yala golay khr3teny
shadan: sadan entay tdren shkether a7bich w akhaf 3alich w etha swetay shay ghala6
me: dshay blmwtho3
shadan: sma3t 3anch 7achy
me: shnu sm3tay w men mnu bel-thab6?
shadan: sadan entay tkalmeen?
me: sara muu?? ehy ely galtlich ?
shadan: sadaan la t9rkhen akeed btgole ana ekhtch w ehya khayfa 3alich
me: ambeeh waay3 jad 7aqera akraha
shadan: saadaan e7trmay nafsch e7na wen ga3den la t9rkhen golelyy 9ij ely galta sara
me: ee 9ij
shadan: sadaan!!! entaay tkalmen 3omrey matwq3t sadan el9byan hal wagt ykhar3on ynkhaf menhom sadan lu wa7ed men khwany wela ome w oboy yadron trou7en feha sadan ana mabech tkrheny bs lazem a3lmich el9a7 men elghala6 
me: ok
shadan: sadaan shnu ok? ana ga3da a7achech la tkhleny aswe shay tet7sfen 3leeh
me: hufff shtabeny agolich??? ee ana aklm wa7ed y7bny
shadan: matkhafen men ahalich w men rabich entay tdren ena ely tswena ghala6 welbent som3a entay matdren hatha shnu ymkn bacher yt7cha 3anch 3end rab3a bel duwawen sadan ana a7bich w akhaf 3alich abe ma9l7tich
me: ee adre ghala6 w wayed fakart bs shadan 9ekay elmwtho3 
shadan: bs ? a9k elmwtho3 mastfdtay shay men ely glta
me: ambala ely ga3d aswe ghala6
shadan: w mentay mswya shay?

i didn't say anything i mean what can i do leave shamlan?

shadan: sadaan give me your phone
me: ambeee shadan latmthlen khalaaa9
shadan: 36eenyyy nowww

shadan took my phone 

she saw the chat crap!

shadan: sadaaaan!!! 6al3a m3a elyoum ynetay? shwahtay esm 3ayltna
sadan: bs 36any my gift w bas
shadan: wen 36ach jedam elnas? akeed shfteeh mukan golay kelshay men a-z now
sadan: lu shtswen lu ts7ben my phone mara7 ahedah shadan i love him and im sure of that lu men telphone elbait
shadan: golely kelshay yala now

and i told her everything 

sara came into the room
me: mashallah 3alich kelshay tgolena mat3rfen tskteen way3 ta7asft eny gltlich 
sara: ana gtlha 7g m9l7tich lu ma7bich w akhaaf 3alech magolha
me: thank you matg9ren 

from that day 
w ana ma a36e sara wayh w a7grha w anfs 3aleha wala ag3ad m3aha
le'anna el7rka ely swtha khaysa jad 7aqera

...
day after day
...

one day ....

leen: tara bacher bnro7 gust
me: okk enzain shalbes
leen: t3alay a6ale3lich
me:ok

we were plaining to go to gust carnival i guess kan shahar 2 maybe

anyway 
the next day 
5 pm
leens , ghayda and reem came to my house to wake me up from my nap

3la ma khl9na getting ready putting make-up
blah blah blaah ...
khal9na 3ala 7 pm

the driver wa9lna there
shamlan and his friends 3endhom booth
bs my cousin jara7 mu m3ahom 
wheeew

while walking

shamlan: PING!!!
me: halllaa
shamlan: t3alay with your friends eshtray mena
me: okaaay

we went to his booth

i was afraid and nervous madry lish 

me: abe 2 redbull with strawberry and w 1 redbull blackberry
ghayda: ana aby ma3a raspberry 

shamlan: ok
bader and  shamlan  ga3d yswon the redbull's 

i gave shamlan the money

i smiled  to him and bader was staring at us
shamlan: bl3afya
me: y3afek

nathrat bader kanat 7ail 7aqera

leens maskena 3ainha ma6a7t 3an bader
w bader 3enna ma6a7t 3any

i went

i was walking  with the girls 

PING!!!

PING!!!

me: haaallllaaaaa dont ping shamlan
shamlan: yala rej3ay elbait bala fraraa
me: loool okaaay i'll call the driver now
shamlan: yalla

i called the driver 
r7na mac 6lbna
r7na baitna 
to my room
ate dinner
w nsolf about today

while chatting
reem: tara fe expo esma get2gether khanfta7 bootthhh
me: ee sma3t 3anah
leen: la khan9er organizer 
me: laa nabe booth a7san walah
ghaydaa: 3nde elrqam ndg?

w ga3dna nkha6e6 w nkha6ee6 

lama 9arat elsa3a 11 pm
radaw elbanat their homes

.....

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry if the chapter is short
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chapter 21

today is Thursday

sara and faisal are coming home
because as u know sara 7amel w  wldat shahar 5 w ra7at 3end ahlhaa
safrna shahar 6 w rj3na before thenschool start

el-kel mwjood
and its been long time masheft the kids and our new baby "nawaar"

everyone was here

salamt 3al kel

me: waaay nawaar tshaweeeeg ambeeh kbarat men zman mu shayfthaa
sara: ee 4 shhour mu chayftha

nawaar is so beautiful she looks just like her mom

i took some pictures with her
 76et'hom bbm

shamlan display name
" shamlan Al****** 'Tonight<3 "
tonight is mine

the next day
friday
its my birthday !!!

the first person who told me happy birthday was shamlaan
and he told me ena he wants to see me tonight

its 1 pm
r7na elzwara
we ate lunch
after that
we went upstairs

mom called me 
mom: sadoon t3alay ta7at entay welbanat
me: okk bye

when i entered 

SURPRISE !!!!

oh my god
i was soo shocked

and the best thing is my sister came from france just to be here with me in my day 

there's a big amazing cake 
everyone brought me gifts
its jara7 turn i wonder shnu yayble 

yable  tiffany Necklace 
it was so beautiful 
ah how cute kesar kha6ree 7aail

 jara7: kel 3am w entay bkhair sadan 3uqbal alf sena
mom: ya7leelk jara7 mashkour 7abeeby matg9r lish kalaft 3ala 3oumrek kafy el-keka
jara7: sadoon testahel akthar
me: aww jara7 thaank you so much ma tg9r
jara7: bs thank you maku hug?
me: hahahaha waay jaraa7

9wart el-gift and the cake w 76etha dp w ktabt bel pm
thank you jara7 ur the best cousin ever ily<3

shamlaan: PING!!!

                     PING!!!!

                     PING!!!

me: halla hallla
shamlan: jara7 yayblich yah????
me: yupp
after 5 min
shamlan: mm

i changed my dp 76ayt w7da ana m9wra with jara7

shamlaan: PING!!!

                    PING!!!!

me: haalaaaa
shamlaan: m9wra ma3ah ba3ad? test3b6en ?
me: 7abeby shamlaan shfek? yayble gift w cake w mswely surprise shtabeny aswela ? 
shamlan: bs mu t9wren ma3ah wen ga3den w entay tdren ena y7bich 
me: okaay anyway ana barou7 p+f 360 b3d shway 7g my friends 3azmeny btye?
shamlan: ee bamer 9a7by w brou7 now muta bt6l3een?
me: al7een bkhle ay a7d yg6ne
shamlan: okk

--------shamlan-------
al7een ana sharelha  perfume w jara7u yayblaha tiffany w cake
hufff what to do ......

....
....
...

me: mama mnu yg6ny 360 elbanat na6reny hnaak
mom: weeeh n6ray shway
me: yala wayed ta'akhrt
mom: uff shofay ay a7d yg6ch
me: mnuu ya3ne yuma entay w3dteny
jara7: ana ag6ch
me: aww okaay

wa9lny jara7 360

r7t p+f 
we ate dinner after that swoly surprise
surprise after surprise :p 
shamlan ga3d wray bel 6awla with his friends

shamlaan: PING!!!

                     PING!!!

me: haaa
shamlan: yalla ana r7t el-car 
me: okay bs wain belthab6

wa9fly wen 9afe6 bel-thab6
3nd p+f

anyway w9lt his car rkabt ma3ah

shamlan: entay a7la w7da fehoom kelhom
i was so shyy
shamlan: kel 3am w entay bkhair 7bebty el3oumer kela inshallah i love you
me: weyak and i love you too

shamlan gave me his gift

actually matwq3t shamlan eyebly gift 
i was shocked
he gave me the perfume 
and i was so happy 
me: shamlaan 7abeebyyy thaankkk you i really truly love it and the best thing its from you!
shamlan : mabena w yebtlich another gift
me: aww shamlaan mala da3ee 2 gifts wala
he gave me a cartier wallet
i was sooo ssooo shocked
me: shamlaaaan madryy shagool walla
shamlan: no neeed to say anything sadan i love you!
me:i love you waaay more
shamlan: i hope jara7 mayfrgna sadan you cant imagine how much i love you 

ghaydaa called

me: ha shfeech?
ghaydaa: emshay bara bsr3a ur mom w ur sister  w mort okhuch hnyy b360 w shafona w sa'alt weinch glnalha bl7amaam
me: haa shittttt kanyy wenkoom ana yayaa men bab p+f
ghaydaa: la ohma b-cacao ra7 yshofonch yaya
me: huff shasawe men wen aye?
ghayda: khalay shamlan yg6ch men bab thany 9oub cinema aw marks&spencer 
me: khala9 okaay ro7aw 9oub el7amam

me: shamlaan ahaly b-cacao g6ne men ay bab
shamlan: okaay
me: huff shhal 7ath waay3

mom called :) crap !

shamlan: mnu?
me: omee
shamlan: la trden tsma3 9out sayara
me: ee 9a7

shamlan 9efa6 9oub elbab ely 3end marks&spencer and bebe

wheew problem solved 

w sheft elbanat w i called mom
me: halla yuma daga?
mom: ee wainch?
me: ana kent bl7amam w my phone bel-bag tawne ashofa 
mom: awal mankhl9 3asha adg 3alech tyen 3ndna
me: okaay bye
mom: bye

after 1 hour w shay
mom called me w salamt 3ala my friends then r7t el-car
sara: mahsallah wayed yaybelich hadaya
me: ee kelw7da yaybtle shay
mom: ouuh yaybelch cartier mnu?
me: hahaha men leens w el3e6er men ghaydaa w el-LV men reem
mom: ahaa tstahleen

w9lna el-bayt

change my clothes 
i was about to sleep

*doorKnock*
me: come in

and its .....

chapter 20

i was shocked and i looked into his eyes and i said

me: jaraa7 ! are you serious?

jara7: mala7thtay all those years i tried to show you but u never cared about me

me: madry shagolk jara7 i ... i'm shocked.. im speechless.

jara7: ee i know le'anna u love shamlan you are never going to give me a chance

me: tawne adre jara7

jara7: le hal daraja entay ghabya! belzwara ma ag3ad ela ma3ach w ma asolf ela weyach w a6al3ch, agolich add me tgolen ana maswe add 7g boys elkel mla7eth ela entay ma a36e wala bent wayh kethr ma a36ech and u don't ever think about me

me: i never thought u will have feelings for me youre just like my brother

jara7: things change! i saw that e7na ... we're better together men kena 9ghar w i liked you !

me: i'm speechless jara7

jara7: never mind emshay dakhel

i went with him to the chalet

i was so shocked that i didn't eat my dinner 

i directly went to the room and thought a lot

actually over thinking is killing me
i don't know what to do!

the next day 7darna
i went home

home sweet home

i told shamlaan

shamlan: sadaaan wakhraay 3anah w belzwara latg3deen ma3ah kela tg3den ma3a omech

i know ena shmlan 39aby w yghar 3ley bs still jara7 yakser kha6re
he is my cousin i cant leave him suddenly.

me: shamlaaaaan he is my cousin shloun awakher, 3anah meny wel6reej ?

shmlaan: ee :)

me: sorry i cant first ohwa my cousin  y7z bkha6ra second elkel beyla7eth , i dont want to hurt him im not heartless.

shmlan: and you care about him? 3ogb ely sawah fech?

me: yup i care & he did the right thing y3ne ychouf his cousin ma3a 9bay shnu tabe yswe yskt w 3ade shnu mu rayal ? w ohwa 7sbat okhuy ma artha 3aleh

shamlan: okaay bs jara7 is over reacting ! w wayed etdaf3een 3anah sadaan nsaitay 3umrech?

me: no i didn't ana wagfa ma3a el7ag 

shamlan: okaaay :)

me: don't be sad

shamlan 7agarne :c

so its our first fight !
both of us ga3d en3aned ba3ath

the next day...

shamlaan: PING!!!

me: halla

shamlaan: i miss u!

me: :$ aww me too

shamlan: i cant live without you

.....

days passed toooo fast
school started

lucky me
leens b9afe

reem and ghayda brou7

its the last year in school

so i gotta study hard and do my best